Welcome to every fucking day of my life for the past 10 years.... [img]graemlins/whatever.gif[/img]
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> What kind of computer do you have?
<font color="yellow">Female Customer:</font> A white one...
===============
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> Have you tried pushing the button?
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> No .. wait a minute... I hadn't inserted
it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry....
===============
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> Click on the 'my computer' icon on to
the left of the screen.
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Your left or my left?
===============
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> Good day. How may I help you?
<font color="yellow">Male Customer:</font> Hello... I can't print.
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> Would you click on "start" for me and...
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Listen pal; don't start getting technical
on me! I'm not Bill Gates, dammit!
===============
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I
can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted
the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still
says he can't find it...
===============
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> I have problems printing in red...
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> Do you have a color printer?
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Aaaah....................thank you.
===============
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.
===============
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> My keyboard is not working anymore.
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> No. I can't get behind the computer.
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> OK
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> Did the keyboard come with you?
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Yes
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> That means the keyboard is not plugged in.
Is there another keyboard?
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work...
===============
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> Your password is the small letter a
as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Is that 7 in capital letters?
===============
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> I can't get on the Internet.
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> Are you sure you used the right password?
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> Can you tell me what the password was?
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Five stars.
===============
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> What anti-virus program do you use?
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Netscape.
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> That's not an anti-virus program.
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
===============
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my
computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.
===============
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> How may I help you?
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> I'm writing my first e-mail.
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> OK, and what seems to be the problem?
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> Well, I have the letter 'a' in the
address, but how do I get the circle around it?
===============
A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> Are you running it under windows?
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> "No, my desk is next to the door, but
that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a
window, and his printer is working fine."
===============
And last but not least...
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> "Okay Bob, let's press the control and
escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle
of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> I don't have a P.
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> On your keyboard, Bob.
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> What do you mean?
<font color="lightgreen">Tech Support:</font> "P".....on your keyboard, Bob.
<font color="yellow">Customer:</font> I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!
Welcome to every fucking day of my life for the past 10 years.... [img]graemlins/whatever.gif[/img]
And these the reasons I like QA.
Everyone hates us, and no on ever asks us any questions.
If they do, the canned response is "Company policy is if you work in IT, and you don't know that, you should be fired", then they freak we are going to tell someone and get them fired. Transistions back nicely into why we never get asked questions [img]wink.gif[/img]
Just yesterday I went on a service call, the lady complained that her printer didn't seem to be plugged in. I checked the back of the computer, and it was fine. The printer driver was okay, and it seemed to be off-line. I asked her again, and she said "It doesn't seem to be plugged in."
I looked down at the power cord, and then at the wall. Yep, it just wasn't plugged in. $50 for a home call, for me to plug in a power cord. Gotta love those kind of customers.
"Hi, I have a problem with the coffee holder"
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">And that is the reason I talked myself out of applying for "Geek Squad" asd a second job cause I'd have to point out how #$#!#ing stupid they areOriginally posted by That Chet Guy:
Just yesterday I went on a service call, the lady complained that her printer didn't seem to be plugged in. I checked the back of the computer, and it was fine. The printer driver was okay, and it seemed to be off-line. I asked her again, and she said "It doesn't seem to be plugged in."
I looked down at the power cord, and then at the wall. Yep, it just wasn't plugged in. $50 for a home call, for me to plug in a power cord. Gotta love those kind of customers.
But at the same time, those are the "easy" cases....
I hate when a nerdy kid starts to suggest alternatives while I try to figure out the problem....."Sorry, you want to do this" ?
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